Ask Kristin Thorisdottir (Psychologist & Coach anything)
“I dated my best friend’s ex-boyfriend and she hated me after that? She asks me to choose one either friendship or love? I am confused”.
First of all, this is a very complicated position to be put in. It is my opinion that nobody should be put in that position to make a choice between two people. On the other hand, I understand that your friend must be really hurt, and it must be really difficult to see you guys together or even know about you guys together. From the feeling of anger, there is always underlying hurt, and your friend has every right to be hurt.
Furthermore, there are things to be considered like, how long or even how deep your friendship goes? How long was your friend’s relationship? Who ended the relationship?
However, I think you have to sit down with your friend and try to understand where she is coming from. She is, after all, your best friend. If you have done something which you think has hurt her feelings, show her some understanding and empathy by being there for her by listening to her and her feelings about the situation. I will personally try to hold on to that friend if she is an important part of your life.
Then comes the two conditions, either she will continue to ask you to choose or simply accept the situation and move on.
Best of luck with everything, Kristin Thorisdottir.
Send Kristin a question about dating or relationships.
