I live with my husband (in a different city), and since my father-in-law passed away, my MIL tags along whenever my husband and I plan an outing. I understand that she is grieving and doesn’t want to be alone, but we also need some privacy.
Expert Advisor- Mel Williams
My father-in-law passed away last year, and my mother-in-law was feeling very lonely and scared, so we invited her to live with us. I do my best to make her feel safe and keep her company. But things start changing; whenever my husband and I plan to go out(dinner or movie), she insists on tagging along. Initially, I didn’t get bothered, as I understood her fear of being alone.
But now, it’s been a year, and she should have gotten over it by now. But she didn’t. Things have become so bizarre that I didn’t get any quality time with my husband over the last year, and my mother-in-law’s constant interference is getting quite annoying.
What should I do to confront her without hurting her?
Expert’s advice: Talk to your husband about it. You don’t want to come off as an evil daughter-in-law trying to separate a son from his mother. Talking to your mother-in-law yourself will make you look bad. Instead, tell your husband that you understand his mother is grieving, but you want to spend some quality time with him. Ask him to talk to his mother in advance whenever they have a date so that she can have something to do that evening.
You can also motivate her to engage in different activities that she might enjoy so she doesn’t have to be dependent on you and your husband to kill time and loneliness.