Being in a relationship means that you are now in a partnership. This is basically two people coming together with one goal. Remember that it’s not always the same goal with couples. For some, it is marriage; others would want companionship without any legalities involved.
At first, things will always be sweet and filled with romance until you are faced with challenges that almost all relationships go through. You will eventually start to wonder about the things that you should never do in a relationship since those things eventually cause resentment to build, hence destroying the bond and feelings from said relationship.
I have listed below five things one should never do when committed in a relationship.
1. Never be the one who always makes all of the sacrifices
Being considerate and kind and loving is all fair and good, but there are times when making all the sacrifices for the relationship to work becomes a negative factor. This will give or show your partner that their constant excuses are okay, and they can keep on doing other things or prioritizing whatever first instead of your relationship because you will always be there to make it work.
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Whether it’s canceling a reservation, skipping out on family meals, unable to attend a family/work gathering, and so on…eventually a person will have to put his/her relationship first to at least show their interest and love.
If you have to do all the work, then it doesn’t mean your relationship is a partnership anymore. Most importantly, if you do all the work, you will most definitely be taken for granted and will no be valued anymore.
Only when we work for something, do we cherish it.
2. Never be the one to keep on fighting when your partner has lost interest
You might have come across these kinds of relationships at least once in your life. Whether it was a movie or a story or even a relationship you knew about. There will be one person trying to make it work while the other person has completely given up on it.
This is where you need to consider time and energy. You will not remain the same age and state of attitude in the next five years or even five months. Certain decisions in our lives can eventually wear us out, and if you decide to continuously try working on a dead end relationship, then you will just be serving yourself up to a load of nothing but regrets down the line. Never fight for someone who does not feel the exact same way about you as you feel about them. It’s not wrong to give your all, especially for love but make sure you are also receiving the love you want. Don’t waste your time hoping. Always remember to do the best thing for yourself.
3. Never pretend not to notice the wrongs on your partner’s side
Ahh yes. This is something common that we all must have done at some point- making excuses for the other person. Because we love them, then we expect them to always feel the way we do, and so we forgive any mistakes on their part and chalk it up to nothing. Letting your partner go scot-free, especially when they do something that is definitely wrong or violating your relationship rules, then they need to be called out and made to face the consequences. Otherwise, this will become a habit, and you will be cleaning up somebody else’s mistakes for the rest of your life whilst forgetting to live your own life.
4. Never expect more than you are giving
For the age we live in, nothing is ever free. This is true for relationships too. It’s not just the man’s job to provide or see to the financial side in a relationship; these things can be done by women too. The same thing goes for emotional values. Trust, love, and support. You both need to be giving these things to your partner’s.
If you give too much and receive too little, this will eventually come to bother you. The same goes for the opposite. So you should know never to expect more than you give. Someone will always feel like they are losing, and it can lead to an issue. You give what you get, and you get what you give. Always remember that.
5. Never forget to put yourself first. You are and will always be the main character in your life’s story
This may sound cruel, but it isn’t. Because of things not being as straight forward as they were years ago, we can never truly know when someone has ulterior motives or just isn’t interested in us but what we can do for them. So the best way to make sure that the damage from a relationship is kept to a minimum is to protect yourself by putting yourself first. If you don’t protect yourself, no one else will do that for you. Remember that chivalry is dead in most cases, and a long term relationship can also diminish that spark of care and consideration a person has at the beginning of a relationship. It’s not always a very happy sight, but this is reality.
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Love is not all that is necessary when it comes to a relationship(marriage or otherwise). There are too many aspects in it, and a person will always have to remember to prioritize themselves too if ever the worst comes to pass. An example of this can be anti nuptial agreement when getting married. This is not because you love your partner any less but because you also love yourself and would want to protect yourself from any unforeseeable harm down the line.
In this way, you make sure that you value your relationship but gain respect from your partner by showing him or her that you also care and value yourself.